In a haze of long summerish days and sweaty faces and papers to write, I've abandoned my lonely blog. If it had feelings, it would have it's arms crossed with me. 'Sure Jen, just use me when you're home with two small kids and no one to talk to. Just type on me whenever YOU need to. No, no! Don't worry about me. I know you have your playdates now and your work and your classes, but it's fine. I'm good. I'll just sit out here in the blogosphere and friggin' twiddle my thumbs while you think of something else to write about. Jackass'. Or something like that.

I wanted to write about guilt. But I can't, really, because I feel too damn guilty. I have two beautiful girls playing with the Noni, legs that are seriously too hairy for public viewing, and a video camera that needs charging for a gymnastics show later. So for my 4 readers, I will bid you adieu and be back on the scene like a sex machine sooner than later. Probably later.

A Walk

I've moved 17 times.

That's a lot. Yes, some of it includes college moves and crazy early 20's apartment living, but it still counts. Packing, unpacking, tossing and keeping. I always wanted to feel, in my digs, a sense of belonging and normalcy. That usually included a few key components. A dry cleaner: I need a familiar face when I drop off my blouses and ask them to pay some special attention to that spot on the right boob which there always seem to be many of. I was called 'Nips' in high school because in a completely unfair turn of events, an afternoon salad with Italian dressing made me look like a wet nurse. Fast forward 15 years later when I do indeed soak through my maternity shirts with the good stuff (I did consider ringing it out once, that stuff is liquid gold!).

Anyway, I liked having a mom and pop dry cleaner on the ready. And a library card. This was important. I love to read. Every night, I read. Even for it's 4 minutes. But I could get lost in libraries, often a spot to escape to when I was living with roommates (did I mention that I'm an only child and I. Like. My. Space.) and wanted to peruse the new Alice Hoffman or the latest Rolling Stone rag in a quiet little spot tucked between the mysteries and the large print sections. I could get lost for hours in a library. And I know that makes me a nerd, but it's cool. I've come to grips with my nerdiness. Nerdiness has served me well.

And what I always needed, no matter how brief my stay...was a place to walk. Of course I would have a variety of routes, depending on the time I had or the type of walk I needed. Is it a business walk meant for a workout only? The track will do. Is it a long walk kind of a day, with drop-ins to a downtown store (or perhaps to pick up my dry cleaning or hit the library?), I have a route for that too. Or maybe it's like the one I took Sunday. Long and lovely and sweeter than I imagined with a gentle wind at my back. I knew where the loud dogs would be, they didn't startle me when they jumped up against the gate. I knew where the guy from Ireland would be, waving to me and talking about the weather and how is daughter is in Quincy. I knew that I would see that lady I see all the time and we'd wave, and that we could repeat that for 20 years and still not know each other's names. And I remembered where that funny bump in the road was, and I hopped right over it. And I knew, as I came back around the way and my house came into view, that I really was home.

More Food. Hug a Tree.

This is a rice burger (GF but of course Sam doesn't like it!), chopped extra firm tofu, sprouts and any other kind of vegetable you can think of. Marinate with any sort of sauce (we went with a light Indian simmer) and it's a full meal of protein, carbs and fat and tons of fiber.

This is actually just a pretty little bit of Amy's Organic Palaak Paneer with steamed broccoli and a glass of the lovely stuff. Kids were away. So was husband. Oh, dear. It was lovely.

Just a beautiful salad (sideways yo!) with real blue cheese.

Sausage simmering for kale, carrot, garlic and onion soup.

If you do, make sure you throw the chopped kale in first. It can take a while to soften.

Seriously? Yum.

Food. The Picture Series.

Roasted butternut squash (or sweet potato) with cubed apple, pear and fresh cranberries.

Cinnamon. Nutmeg.

Lots of love.

5 Dollar Foot Long Munchkin Veggie Roll

I hope you can grasp from this photo (I'm taking lots of pictures of really beautiful and colorful food and I only think it's a little tiny bit weird not completely holy-crap-she-needs-more-work, weird) how amazing this meal was. The largest and most delicious portion of seaweed salad I ever did see. Extra shaved ginger and wasabi 'for the pretty lady' at no cost (you will always have me hooked with the pretty lady stuff, by the way). And 12, yes 12! fresh, scrumptious and completely satisfying vegetable rolls with cucumber, avocado, asparagus and sesame rice.

Now, in retrospect, I should have taken a gander at the lunch specials. But the whole experience was a whirlwind. Children's Hospital appointment for Sam and her Celiac Disease, trip over to hubby's work for 'show off your kid day' (okay, it was just us who did that), and at the same time, manage to squeeze a meal in for mom.

Normally we are planners to the nth degree. We go everywhere with snacks and meal and drinks (because we have to with our peanut), but I had a plan this day. I wanted sushi. I would have it.

BUT, it's a sushi place wedged between a Subway and a Dunkin Donuts. I'm not even kidding. So you start to wonder and listen to the naysayers (of which I was one)....really? Should I go there? Will it be fresh? Legit? The real deal?

So I try another spot that is recommended, Ma Soba. Fancy. Sit down service. Not flanked by fast food spots on either side. But not open until 11:30. I had a husband and two small tired, crankabotomous kids in the car and a short window of time before they became truly wretched and started throwing shoes.

So Osaka it was. Shoved into a little space, these guys worked the bamboo roll with deft precision and the craftsmanship of sushi masters. It was fast and fresh and soooo good. It was lunch and dinner. And I wasn't too late to the car and the kids.

But the shoes still came off.

Recipes you did not ask for. But I'm a giver.

Ginger Bok Choy Up In Here

1. Don't be afraid of the bok choy. It's the green stuff in all the sweet and sour chinese food plates we eat.

2. It's really good! Like celery on one end and crunchy romaine on the other.

3. Sautee some fresh or minced garlic in a medium-heat pan with some Pam spray or a spot of oil.

4. Add the chopped bok choy (as much as you want boo boo!) into the pan. Don't burn it.

5. Add a bit of marinade if you want. I went with the Archer Farms Asian Ginger Marinade. Ridiculous.

6. Add some bean sprouts at the end.

7. Add some protein if you want...beans, chicken breast, veggie burger. Tortoise. Whatev.

8. Eat it. Enjoy it. Tell your friends about it.

Roasted Root (come on, that's funny right?)

1. Bite sized pieces of butternut squash (or sweet potato)

2. Halved pecans or walnuts

3. Fresh whole cranberries (the dried ones become bullets and those aren't fun in the teeth).

4. Bite sized pieces (not too thin or they'll lose the sweetness) of apple or pear

5. Roast it for 15-ish minutes, keep checking on it.

6. I found mine to be ready when the cranberries were no longer tart.

7. Add a drizzle of maple syrup or honey. Enjoy with your favorite person and tell them how terrific I am for giving you this idea.

Butternut Squash Risotto

(this is stolen from Rachael Ray, but I skipped the butter, wine and sage...the kids didn't go for it but remember that they worship applesauce and hot dogs).

Ingredients:
One 32-ounce container (4 cups) chicken broth
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil (EVOO)
1 small onion, finely chopped
2 cloves garlic, grated or finely chopped
2 cups arborio rice
1 cup dry white wine
One 12-ounce box frozen butternut squash puree, thawed
Nutmeg
Salt and pepper
1 cup grated parmigiano-reggiano cheese
2 tablespoons butter, cut into small pieces
10 leaves fresh sage, slivered

Directions:
In a large saucepan, bring the chicken broth and 1 cup water to a boil over medium-high heat, then turn the heat to low.

In a large skillet, heat the EVOO , 2 turns of the pan, over medium-high heat. When the oil is rippling, add the onion and garlic and cook, stirring occasionally, until softened, 2 minutes. Add the rice and toast for 3 minutes. Stir in the wine and cook, stirring occasionally, until mostly evaporated, 2 to 3 minutes.

Add 2 ladlefuls of the warm chicken broth to the rice and stir until the liquid evaporates. Repeat with the remaining broth, cooking the risotto until creamy, about 18 minutes.

During the last 3 minutes of cooking, stir in the squash; season with nutmeg, salt and pepper.

During the last minute of cooking, stir in the cheese and butter. Top with the sage.

Are you Really Suprised?

I really really really wish I were a better blogger. I wish I could run off and type all the things I think about all day, but you know I just don't. Dinners to be made and clothes to be laid out and floors to be swept and honestly, there are bottoms to wipe. Don't get me wrong, I can waste time like a champion (remember this?). Anyway, the detox continued to go really well. And then we ended up in the ER with one lethargic little girl (long story, really longer and the most important thing is that she's fine, thankfully) and the chicken salad sandwich the nurse gives you is in your gullet faster than you can say 'kale spinach frittata'. I kept going though, not perfectly, and made some really interesting (life changing? naaah...maybe?) observations about myself:

-holy crap, I CAN live on vegetables and I will NOT die.

-vegetables are really good and really satisfying.

-I don't need as much protein as I eat. I need far, far less.

-I actually don't have to eat the candy in the dish. (I won't die!)

-I really love good chocolate (Ahoooo! Cacao!) and I will eat it every day of my life. Detox bedamned.

-that wasabi vinaigrette stuff? Good lord. I could put it on just about anything.

-new recipes are scary but waaaay more fun. (See this super cool book from my mother-in-law).

-it's not about having less and being satisfied, it's about finding interesting ways to be satisfied that go beyond the carrot and celery stick. I made butternut squash risotto for goodness sake!

Onward and upward and I'm surprised that I'm surprised by how good it feels. Wow, taking care of myself (which sometimes includes Mike's Pastry from the North End) is good for everyone in my home.

I'm on the list, bitches! And I'm going to stay on it!

Peace, namaste.

Go eat some eggplant.